why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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