i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
