so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
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