People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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