Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Randomize
