He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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