ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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