Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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