He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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