I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
