Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
All the doctor said was why
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
