thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize
