I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
