The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
and you fell through a lawn chair
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