Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
