Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Randomize
