i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
