glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
