have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
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