He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Randomize
