So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize
