we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
