So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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