you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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