my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
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