we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
