That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
