And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
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