Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
