I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
