Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
