big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize
