she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
