he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
third nipple confirmed
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
