How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
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