When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
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