If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize
