I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Randomize
