She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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