I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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