Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Randomize
