I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
