It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Randomize
