And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
