I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Randomize
