By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize