dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
