no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I am naked and annoyed.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
