at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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