Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
